Monday, December 15, 2008

Have a Lice Day

I got another call this afternoon from my boss asking for (you guessed it) a last minute sub. This time it was for an after school dance class that I've taught before so it required no prep time whatsoever. I just needed to be at the school when classes ended for the day and dance with the kids for 45 minutes. Since I'm the world's best employee I said yes. I really need to learn how to say no.

Things were going well until about 5 minutes into class when I was doing a brief introduction exercise with the elementary school age girls. When asked what she did over the weekend, one of the girls (I'll call her Lacey) said "well we were going to go to our cousin's house but we found some nits in my hair (as in head lice eggs) and so then we couldn't go." Grateful to be sitting across the room from her, I asked the obvious "if you found some nits, then why are you at school?" I then thought (but did not repeat out loud), "If your relatives, who ostensibly love you, don't want you around them when you're nit infested, you can bet this stranger is not happy to be in the same room with you for the afternoon." Lacey then said something about how the nits hadn't seemed to change over the course of 4 hours, so it was OK to be there. Her attempt at reassurance didn't soothe me at all. I was grateful Una, with her golden locks that I'm sure any louse would be pleased to call home, was not with us. I managed to keep my person and Duet away from Lacey for the remainder of the class. Now I'm focusing my energies on asking Santa to keep us lice-free this holiday season. Does Santa answer requests like that?

They do not pay me enough to put up with this crap.

P.S. I'm so congested today I can barely breathe through my nose. I put the workout on hold for today but I'm hoping I can breathe well enough to do it tomorrow. I did manage to deliver some Christmas treats to my boss and co-workers. Some might call that ass kissing. I call that service.

7 comments:

Aubrey said...

I read the one sentence as "I'm focusing my energies on asking Satan to keep us lice-free." I had to read it twice

Shobe said...

What??? I don't think anyone would have blamed you if you had called her gaurdian to come pick her up!

Steve and Kenna said...

There is no pay that is enough to put up with that. The Princess had a note come home that a kid in her class had lice. I told her to stay far away for that kid and her hair has been tied up. I hate this kind of things.

Mary Poppins said...

mrs f--indeed i will, but not to satan (see aubrey's comment).

aubrey--interesting. what kind of subconscious thoughts are you having anyway? around these parts, we try not to focus our energies on satan. reminds me of that old church lady sketch from snl with dana carvey. "could it be...satan?"

shobe--didn't even think about it. but that would have been brilliant.

kenna-amen! i'm hoping your plans worked out and that the princess stays lice-free too.

amydear said...

Hmm. Some people have differing standards, I guess. I can't tell you how many times I heard these words in primary "I just threw up this morning, but I'm feeling better now." Augh!

Mary Poppins said...

amydear--in this case i'm not very tolerant of differing standards when they differ from my own.

Mary said...

I think it's time to suggest to the school that they buy some Bug Bags.
In Europe kids put their coat in them and they are used in 50% of the schools. It has greaty reduced the outbreaks of head lice. It's even recommended by the Dept of Health. Check it out on www.bugbagusa.